Kelleher International Blog

Politics and Dating: An Unlikely Pair

With Super Tuesday just around the corner, at Kelleher International matchmaking, we’re reminded of the delicate relationship between politics and dating. In today’s political climate, we often have clients with hard and fast rules regarding the political affiliation of their potential dates.

But what happens if you don’t have a matchmaker and fall for someone before you know their political leanings? 

It is possible to separate politics and dating and develop a lasting romance. 

The key to setting your relationship up for success counts on thoughtful communication.

Limit political discussions. And when they occur, focus on listening to understand your partner’s perspective. Trying to “win” or change their mind is when dialogue turns into a fight. So, always tread lightly and remember how much you love this person and appreciate their right to have an opposing opinion. Celebrate choice and democracy rather than getting angry.

How do you dodge political arguments during an election year?

Many people want to stay engaged in the political process but don’t want to mix politics and their personal lives. 

“Why not listen to the news or your favorite political podcast during your daily commute rather than at home with your significant other,” suggest Amber Kelleher-Andrews, Kelleher International CEO. “If things tend to get heated, don’t watch the presidential debates together. Let that be something you do with friends of the same political affiliation. Remember that there’s no singular way to do this. Together you and your partner get to decide the boundaries that work for your relationship.”

How do you handle judgment from friends and family that disagree with your partner’s politics?

If you are happy with your partner and you have a copacetic relationship around your opposing political viewpoints, then it doesn’t matter what others think. You can’t make everyone happy, so you better please yourself.

If your partner enjoys riling up your family or friends, that’s a different story. Perhaps a conversation is in order. Your significant other might not realize what seems like playful banter to them causes you unwanted grief when it comes to the backlash you here from mom and dad. 

Mitigate future altercations by setting ground rules with your partner about the things you do and don’t discuss with family and friends this election season.

Overly passionate political opinions can be a real turn-off, no matter your affiliation.

Especially in the early stages of dating, be mindful not to go overboard. It takes time to learn the nuances of someone’s personality. Someone new might mistake your passionate political barking as an attack. And a perfectly great match might fizzle out before the flame ever gets going.

Politics and dating don’t make the best combination, but if you’re a kind, open-minded, and reasonable communicator, you’re already ahead of the game. 

And if you want to avoid the politics and dating issue all together, give Kelleher International a call. We have those conversations for you ahead of time. And we’ll only push you out of your comfort zone when there’s an excellent match ready to meet you across the aisle.

“The key is finding a partner that can listen to your viewpoint and respects your perspective, says Kelleher’s director of matchmaking, Kimberly Colgate. “We have many successful couples who are opposites in many ways. But they typically share core beliefs like how they treat others, a reverence for love, and mutual respect. These are the determining factors in their ultimate success as a couple.”

We wish you luck in love and politics.